The beginning step in bringing up children who are totally free of tantrums all of their childhood days is to stop subscribing to what the parenting experts have been advising us-that tantrums are normal and natural and highly inevitable and unpreventable when raising children. This concept is simply untrue. Virtually all kids could be raised tantrum-free if only the parents knew how to accomplish it. I can teach you how. My first five children, as babies, all threw tantrums, but my last eight didn't. When my fifth was fourteen months old, I learned what needed to be changed in my parenting style, and by one week or so he had totally stopped throwing tantrums. My last eight babies never threw temper tantrums because I'd taught them from the time they were born to trust me to respond the way they needed me to when they were angry.
Where might this tantrum-universality myth have originate from-besides that it's been passed down through the generations? It's been unclear just how many children parenting experts have had on the average, but my limited pre-Wikipedia and pre-Internet research from about twenty years ago indicated it was maybe one or two each, and I doubt that it's increased since then. Book-writing parenting experts typically haven't said how many children they've had. One often has to guess by the people they've dedicated their books to. It's really true.
I doubt that any parent could possibly learn everything there is to learn about parenting with only one or two preschoolers or even one or two teenagers. I learned crucial skills with my fourth and fifth children. And I'm still learning. Parents usually like to keep their parenting imperfections hidden, though. No one enjoys openly admitting to their parenting faults.
So, here's how I believe the misconception about tantrum universality came about. In general, parenting experts (who got that way mostly from going to college and not so much from taking care of children) have a greater-than-average need to present as the perfect parents. Because they have designated themselves as expert in raising children, there is an accompanying implication that they are nearly perfect at it.
But not long after becoming parents, most of these experts suddenly have their own kids who throw temper tantrums. This proves their textbook theories about tantrum universality. If even the expert parents (themselves) raise tantrum-throwing children, then of course no inexpert parents could do better. Right? Wrong. Millions of inexpert parents have raised tantrum-free children. I know that tantrum-free child rearing is certainly possible, and highly preferable. It's also a great deal more enjoyable (than the alternative) for every person involved, including the general public. I can tell you how to create a family lifestyle totally free of tantrums.
Where might this tantrum-universality myth have originate from-besides that it's been passed down through the generations? It's been unclear just how many children parenting experts have had on the average, but my limited pre-Wikipedia and pre-Internet research from about twenty years ago indicated it was maybe one or two each, and I doubt that it's increased since then. Book-writing parenting experts typically haven't said how many children they've had. One often has to guess by the people they've dedicated their books to. It's really true.
I doubt that any parent could possibly learn everything there is to learn about parenting with only one or two preschoolers or even one or two teenagers. I learned crucial skills with my fourth and fifth children. And I'm still learning. Parents usually like to keep their parenting imperfections hidden, though. No one enjoys openly admitting to their parenting faults.
So, here's how I believe the misconception about tantrum universality came about. In general, parenting experts (who got that way mostly from going to college and not so much from taking care of children) have a greater-than-average need to present as the perfect parents. Because they have designated themselves as expert in raising children, there is an accompanying implication that they are nearly perfect at it.
But not long after becoming parents, most of these experts suddenly have their own kids who throw temper tantrums. This proves their textbook theories about tantrum universality. If even the expert parents (themselves) raise tantrum-throwing children, then of course no inexpert parents could do better. Right? Wrong. Millions of inexpert parents have raised tantrum-free children. I know that tantrum-free child rearing is certainly possible, and highly preferable. It's also a great deal more enjoyable (than the alternative) for every person involved, including the general public. I can tell you how to create a family lifestyle totally free of tantrums.
About the Author:
Learn more about how toeliminate tantrums . Visit Leanna Rae Scott's site to learn how to prevent temper tantrums.
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