Many parenting "experts," that is, those who got that way primarily from attending university and not so much from raising kids, tell us that children under one year or six months of age can't experience actual anger. These "experts" see newborns as pre-functional, emotionally. They say that even when babies sound angry, they're really not. They're just communicating according to their primal instincts, or something. It's unclear what these parenting professionals believe happens to babies at the magical age of six months or one year that makes them finally able to be angry when they sound angry. But I disagree with them on their basic premise.
In the process of having and raising thirteen kids, I've discovered a few things about how infants function. I think newborns are real people who experience real emotions. I think they're entirely capable of feeling real anger from the moment they're born. If infants' needs aren't me, they experience very natural human anger. And that anger can and does sometimes escalate into temper tantrums. As well, infants are entirely capable of understanding their caregivers' responses to their anger, and they're easily able to understand whether or not they're getting what they need. If babies regularly don't have their anger needs met, they solidly come to trust that likelihood and become predisposed to escalate rapidly into temper tantrums. If they consistently do have their anger needs met, however, they come to trust that likelihood instead and become predisposed not to escalate into throwing temper tantrums.
Every one of my first five babies threw temper tantrums, but none of my last eight children did. The last eight didn't throw tantrums because I had learned with child number five what needed to be changed in my parenting style. He was fourteen months old when this happened and he was free of temper tantrums within one week of my starting the new techniques with him. These techniques are now part of what I call, "Infant Anger Management."
There's no scientific evidence to support the common theories that all children throw temper tantrums, or that tantrums are normal and natural in child development. There are so many theories about the causes of tantrums in children-including that brain chemicals are the cause! The most common theories, however, center around children's: inability to express themselves with words, low tolerance for frustration, lack of problem-solving skills, lack of ways to let out emotions, and need for attention. These things do not cause temper tantrums! They only cause pre-tantrum anger in the children. If parents know how to respond to pre-tantrum anger, it doesn't develop into tantrums. Children who are used to parents responding properly to their frustration angers tend to develop lots of patience and don't escalate to the point of tantrums.
The first step of "Infant Anger Management" is to respond properly to children's and infants' pre-tantrum anger. In this method I teach parents everything they need in order to totally prevent and totally eliminate tantrums in their children, even if they have ODD, ADD, or ADHD.
In the process of having and raising thirteen kids, I've discovered a few things about how infants function. I think newborns are real people who experience real emotions. I think they're entirely capable of feeling real anger from the moment they're born. If infants' needs aren't me, they experience very natural human anger. And that anger can and does sometimes escalate into temper tantrums. As well, infants are entirely capable of understanding their caregivers' responses to their anger, and they're easily able to understand whether or not they're getting what they need. If babies regularly don't have their anger needs met, they solidly come to trust that likelihood and become predisposed to escalate rapidly into temper tantrums. If they consistently do have their anger needs met, however, they come to trust that likelihood instead and become predisposed not to escalate into throwing temper tantrums.
Every one of my first five babies threw temper tantrums, but none of my last eight children did. The last eight didn't throw tantrums because I had learned with child number five what needed to be changed in my parenting style. He was fourteen months old when this happened and he was free of temper tantrums within one week of my starting the new techniques with him. These techniques are now part of what I call, "Infant Anger Management."
There's no scientific evidence to support the common theories that all children throw temper tantrums, or that tantrums are normal and natural in child development. There are so many theories about the causes of tantrums in children-including that brain chemicals are the cause! The most common theories, however, center around children's: inability to express themselves with words, low tolerance for frustration, lack of problem-solving skills, lack of ways to let out emotions, and need for attention. These things do not cause temper tantrums! They only cause pre-tantrum anger in the children. If parents know how to respond to pre-tantrum anger, it doesn't develop into tantrums. Children who are used to parents responding properly to their frustration angers tend to develop lots of patience and don't escalate to the point of tantrums.
The first step of "Infant Anger Management" is to respond properly to children's and infants' pre-tantrum anger. In this method I teach parents everything they need in order to totally prevent and totally eliminate tantrums in their children, even if they have ODD, ADD, or ADHD.
About the Author:
Learn more about eliminating tantrums withInfant Anger Management . Visit Leanna Rae Scott's site to learn how to use Infant Anger Management.
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