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dimanche 29 décembre 2013

Dealing With Your Emotions After Your Breakup

By Kathleen Swain


Whether you've just gone through a breakup and you want to get your ex back or you want to move on, often overcoming the pain can be a seemingly impossible task.

It's frustrating when you find someone that you like or even love and he doesn't feel the same way. There probably is nothing wrong with you. It's simply a matter of attraction and understanding that men feel attracted to women for some very strange reasons. Beyond physical attraction, a man will fall in love with a woman, or you, because of some emotions that he will feel when he's around you. If you can recreate these emotions then a man will feel attraction and eventually love no matter what you look like or what your social status is.

A man who sees a woman as somehow different than the other women around him will cause him to start to become attracted to her. If he is accustomed to women who chase him or flirt with him and he find a woman that doesn't flirt with him then she will feel different. Inversely, if he is used to women that ignore him or think of him as only smart or funny and he finds a woman that sees his other attributes then he will become attracted to her. She will appear different to him.

First, stop trying to analyze everything. Stop trying to make all of this more complicated than it needs to be. Think of her just like you would any other woman. She's not perfect and she is bound to have some flaws. If you wind up putting her up on a pedastal and kissing her feet she's going to lose respect for you and you're going to start to give off a creepy vibe.

Understand that the breakup doesn't rest entirely upon your shoulders. While it might be easy to take the brunt of the blame on yourself since you are responsible for your own actions, both you and your ex are to blame for this breakup. Placing blame isn't really important though. What is important is that you learn from the past and move on towards your future.

How can you make him feel at ease around you? Ask him some prying questions. Avoid the typical questions like about his hobbies or his work or what he likes to do to relax. Think about more probing questions and allow this line of questioning to lead you to who he really is. Comment about the things he talks about by agreeing that something that he tells you must have been difficult or fun depending upon the topic. Let him open up to you and express his feelings and emotions without judgement and you will find that he will feel drawn to you and want to be around you to talk and be himself.

Loving yourself, accepting yourself as you are is important. In this life there are going to be times when you will be alone. You have to be your own best friend. You have to treat yourself well and start doing things that are going to make you happy. This might mean something as simple as watching a movie that makes you smile and improves your mood even when you don't want to or treating yourself to a little shopping therapy. A quick trip to the store to buy yourself a present can prove to yourself that you love yourself. Before you laugh or think that this is ridiculous, give it a try.

Be different and stand out from the crowd by being yourself while understanding that a man needs to feel certain emotions to fall in love. Be understanding of what he needs and you will find that he becomes magnetically attracted to you very quickly. Every man wants and needs a woman in his life that can make him feel true love. You can be that woman. The benefits are apparent in a strong, healthy relationship based upon mutual attraction and respect. If you have found that perfect guy or you're already in a relationship with a guy that seems to be slipping away from you, try some of these tricks for making him love you. You won't be sorry.




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